By Haley Essington and Sydney Souness
If you’ve ever wondered about the mystery that is Mr. Carniaux, you’re not alone. So many have wondered about Brendan “Desmond” Carniaux that he has become a legend here at EGHS. If you’ve ever had questions about this legend of a teacher, fear not. We, your trusty writers here at the Spectrum, have gone in to answer any and all questions about one of EGHS’s most fascinating characters. Not surprisingly, Mr. Carniaux loves teaching here. In fact, he describes his job as “the best job in the world” because he can do what he loves every day- playing music. We asked him how music influences his life, but he told us that the truth is actually reversed. He believes, rather, that his life influences his music, because of the way he can express himself through it. But where did this love of music come from? Well, let’s start from the beginning. Brendan Carniaux started to learn music when he played his first instrument, the cello, in kindergarten. From there, he went on to learn saxaphone at 7th grade in Cole, when Mr. Stabile was the music teacher. He enjoys a wide range of music, from Wilco and the Talking Heads to Miles Davis and John Coltrane.
Perhaps the reason Mr. Carniaux is such a good teacher here is that he went to this high school himself, though it was quite different when he attended. Teachers like Mr. Rath, Mr. Brocato, Mr. Petrucci and Mr. Lennox were all teaching here when he was a student (he’s gotten past the weirdness of having his former teachers as his colleagues). He told us about how it was a lot more independent, and how it was an open campus with a lot more freedom for seniors. Typical Mr. Carniaux is definitely not afraid to be himself here. In a “spur of the moment” decision, he decided this year to take a picture with his Ron Swanson bobblehead for his yearbook picture (despite the protests of the photographers). If you haven’t seen it yet, just wait. Though Mr. Carniaux enjoys being spontaneous in instances like this, he says that his days are fairly routine. His day usually goes something like this: he wakes up around 5, comes to the school for jazz rehearsal, and then enjoys a cup of coffee in his Jiggers mug to “mentally prepare for the day.” Often times, he plays gigs in the evening so he usually goes home to practice.
Mr. Carniaux also takes food very seriously. He has eaten some strange meals in his life, including “blue mountain oysters,” which you should look up because we don’t have the heart to tell you, poor innocent readers, what they are. However, he told us that the one food he could eat for the rest of his life is easy: Frank & John’s pepperoni pizza.
Naturally, we asked him many questions about food because, well, those are clearly the most important ones. He described to us his ideal grilled cheese sandwich, which includes brie cheese, bacon, red peppers, and caramelized onions, but not tomatoes. He considers them a “vile weed.”
It should be noted that the name “Desmond” holds a special place in his heart, because clearly Desmond Carniaux would be the coolest name in the world, though his wife often calls him “Bean.” Both suit him very well. He and his wife have a dog, Phoebe the Chow. It seems he’s always been a dog person, though as a child he did have two chameleons named Micky and Murdock, which, if you’re curious, he says are buried somewhere near 178 Tanglewood Drive. Finally, we asked him a very important question: what would you do with a million dollars? His answer was simply: “disappear.” Quite frankly, that could be the most Carniaux-esque thing ever said. Though we don’t doubt his ability to disappear off the grid, we’d certainly miss him at EGHS.